The New Cry for Help

Fireworks on the Fourth of July

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Fourth of July weekend I was logged in to Facebook when I noticed that a friend had changed her relationship status to “Open Relationship”.  This particular friend has been married for more than 10 years and has 3 kids, the youngest having just turned 2.

I know her, and I know better.  She’d also changed her “looking for” to “dating”.  I commented on the relationship status change (something like “open to what? murder?”).  I texted her later to find out what the heck was going on.  She said she and her husband had been fighting about a comment he had made on a female friend’s page, so she had changed her information just to irk him.  Nice to air your dirty laundry in front of family, friends and acquaintances.

Last week another friend changed her relationship status to “In a Relationship but it’s Complicated.”  This is someone who has been married for probably 15 years to a good friend of mine, and they have two little boys. 

I commented on her status (I asked “how complicated?”) and she responded to my comment by saying that she and her husband had separated and were trying to work things out.  This irked me because she seems to be the type to value her privacy somewhat.  At least she used to.

There was really no reason to change her relationship status.  She’s still married to the guy, and after her friends comments (“Oh no! Poor thing!”  “How terrible!”) she replied that she had faith they would work things out.  So what was the point?

I love Facebook.  I love posting funny little status messages, and seeing my friends’ status messages, looking at their pictures, playing games (but no farming!).  It’s cute, it’s fun.  I’ve rediscovered some people I thought were lost to me forever.

I really don’t understand people who use this as a medium for a public airing of their grievances.  Some things are just meant to be private.

In fact, I did a gmail search for friends on Facebook and went to add a contact I’ve been working with professionally.  She refused my friend request saying “it’s really just for my family”, and I get that.

My friends list includes friends, family, family of friends, friends of family, as well as a few business acquaintances and professional contacts.  For that reason I’m not going to be posting sexy photos or dropping anything too heavy there.  If I want my real friends to know something, I’m going to email or pick up the phone.

What do you use your Facebook for?

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One response to “The New Cry for Help

  1. Pingback: Who Do I Write Like? | Becoming Cheryl

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