I’ve had a lot on my mind the last few months and my mental activity went off the charts last night.
Here’s the thing: I am unhappy with my life where it is right now (and have been for a while) and I’ve been thinking about making some drastic changes, including (but not limited to) moving back to my home state (with or without my husband, but most likely without), leaving my job, etc.
I need to shake things up. I need to feel like I’m moving forward. I need to feel like I belong somewhere.
I’d pretty much decided to move. My marriage has been going “ok” lately, but I feel like “ok” is really the least you can hope for. I’m still trying to figure out what this relationship holds for me.
Work, well, I hate it. We got a new boss a year ago and since he signed on things have gone completely wonky, and frankly, I hate getting up in the morning and going into that job. The only reason I go is that they pay me, and I have great friends there who commiserate with me and make me laugh.
One of those friends has interviewed for a job with another agency, and it’s looking like she will be leaving. She had to take a test there yesterday, and she called me last night to tell me how it went, and then she told me that they are looking for a departmental manager for a department like the one we currently work in.
I could do this job. It would mean a pay raise, and I would be out from under the thumb of the guy I can’t stand. But it would mean staying here a while longer.
I’m going to check it out and see what happens, then make some future plans based on the outcome of this. I just can’t stop thinking about what it all means.